Cutting Down Your drinking or Moderating
Moderating your alcohol intake or cutting down how much you drink are often used as a way of drinking less. However, trying to moderate something you believe you need will always require a lot of willpower, which usually always runs out!
cutting down your drinking
Have you ever tried cutting down on your drinking, or moderating?
If you have, then you probably know that you’re drinking too much or you’re just sick and tired of feeling like shit half the time.
Maybe you’re tired of waking up hungover, having no energy, and feeling like you’re stuck in an endless loop of feeling like crap, struggling through the day and then drinking again in the evening.
If you have tried to cut down in the past, I bet, you’ve tried at least one of the following ‘tips’ if not all of them, and I bet that non of them worked for very long.
The usual tips for cutting down drinking
- Drink only at the weekend or just a few days a week
- Drink lower strength alcohol
- Buy smaller bottles
- Buy just enough booze for that night
- Alternate your drinks with water
- Delay your drinking until a certain time
- Give yourself a strict budget on a night out of how much you’ll spend/drink
I’m certain you will have tried these ‘tips’ because these are pretty much all the tips that there are for cutting down your drinking.
Yet non of them seem to work.
Why is that?
Why Cutting Down Your Drinking Doesn't Work
The fact is, non of the tips above address the root cause of the problem.
Trying to limit something that you believe you need in order to relax, to be social, to chill out, to escape reality, or be creative or whatever it is, will only make it harder to resist.
When you believe alcohol is a good thing then drinking less of it is going to feel like some kind of punishment.
It’s only a matter of time then before your willpower runs out and you’re back to square one.
getting to the root of the problem
These kind of tips for cutting down your drinking just don’t address the root of the problem.
A bit like cutting the leaves off a weed and expecting it to stop growing.
Yes, the weed will be gone for a few days, but the roots are still there and before long it’ll be back.
You need to attack the root cause of the problem.
That is, focussing on your beliefs about alcohol.
Who gets the blame when you fail to cut down on your drinking?
Before we get to beliefs, let’s quickly think about what happens when you try to cut down on your drinking, but fail.
Who gets the blame?
Who do you point the finger at when you fail to cut down or moderate alcohol?
You.
You blame yourself.
Every single time.
What happens when you blame yourself?
When you blame yourself for failing to control your drinking, you start to question yourself. Maybe some of the following thoughts sound familiar:
- I’m weak-willed
- I’m powerless
- Maybe I’m an alcoholic?
- Maybe I have a real problem with alcohol?
- Maybe I just have an addictive personality?
- Maybe I’m meant to be this way?
- I’m just a failure at this
- I can’t do this
- I’ll never be able to control alcohol
- Maybe it’s in my genes and I’ll never be able to stop?
But you are not the problem.
Alcohol is the problem.
More accurately. Alcohol within our society is the problem.
Not you.
But it gets worse...
As if your failure to quit isn’t bad enough, and then putting the blame on yourself.
Then…
THEN…
Your self-esteem and self-confidence gets destroyed because you ‘failed’.
And what happens then?
You head straight back to the bar to do the only thing you think you’re good at.
Drinking.
But as you take your first drink, four things are happening.
Four things that happen when you drink
So you decide to forget all about cutting down your drinking, and happily head back to the bar.
Once you’re there having that first drink, four things kick in.
One
First of all, the alcohol heads straight to your brain and releases a quick hit of dopamine.
Dopamine is the body’s feel-good chemical, and alcohol is very good at releasing it, so not long after taking that first sip, you’re going to get a little hit of happiness.
“Ahh, this is why I like drinking so much” you think.
While this sounds pretty cool, in the long term it’s not.
Over time you’ll need more and more alcohol in order to get the same dopamine hit, which is why many people end up drinking more and more.
It’s this dopamine hit that makes alcohol physically addictive too.
Your brain just wants more!
Two
Secondly, alcohol is a diuretic which means it promotes water loss through urine.
Which basically means, as you drink alcohol, it dehydrates you at the same time.
So as you’re drinking, you’re getting thirsty.
It’s no wonder you can drink so much!
Especially on a hot sunny day!!
How else can you down five pints of beer, and still wake up in the middle of the night gagging for a glass of water?
Three
Third, you feel like you’re back where you belong.
Life is easier again.
You’re back in with the social norm, along with your mates, doing what everyone else is doing.
Who wants to be the odd one out anyway?
Not drinking felt hard, but drinking is easy.
Even if it is doing you more harm than good.
Four
And finally, as you continue to drink, your inhibitions along with all your good intentions blur into an amber haze.
Those ideas you had of cutting down are quickly replaced with that good old one-liner
‘Fuck it, I’m having another beer.’
Your beliefs drive your behaviour
Maybe you really believe that you need alcohol in order to relax after a hard day at work, or to escape the reality of life, or have to have a laugh with your mates or a good night out with your partner.
Maybe you believe that alcohol is a man’s drink and that in order to be a man, you need to booze.
To be one of the lads, you need to drink pints of beer, because that’s what men do.
Maybe you believe that alcohol helps manage your emotions, helps you control anxiety, blot everything out and sleep more easily.
But the reality is, alcohol doesn’t help any of these thing in the long term.
It’s only ever a temporary fix.
A temporary fix that often causes or enhances many of the problems you think it’s fixing.
And until you can change your beliefs about alcohol, and see it for what it truly is, you’ll always struggle to moderate or quit.
The wooden mallet theory
Imagine that every time you’re stressed or want to relax (or whatever it is that you use alcohol for) instead of drinking alcohol, you go out to the shops and buy a wooden mallet.
Then, you quickly dash home, sit down and hit yourself a few times on the head with the mallet, then throw it in the bin.
That would hurt and be pointless, right?
How many times would you want to hit yourself on the head with a wooden mallet?
Probably zero.
You just wouldn’t do it.
Why?
Because you are absolutely certain that it adds no value to your life whatsoever.
No one else does it, it does nothing for you and it just hurts.
It’s pointless.
And because you believe that with every ounce of your being, you just don’t do it.
Therefore…
How to take control of your drinking: The system that works
In order to take control of your drinking, forget about cutting down, and start addressing your beliefs about alcohol.
Ask yourself:
Is alcohol really your friend?
Is alcohol really helping you to get over the problems you’re using it for?
Is it really helping you in any way, or is it doing more harm than good?
Question your beliefs
Spend a few minutes writing down all of the different reasons you use alcohol.
Is it to relieve boredom, to relax, to have a good time, or because you feel like you deserve a drink?
Whatever it is, write it down.
Then question whether or not you think alcohol is really adding value to your life.
You may be convinced right now that, yes, alcohol is helping me.
But look at the bigger picture.
Is alcohol really helping you in a positive and healthy way?
Or is it only papering over the cracks?
True freedom from alcohol comes from being able to choose not to drink.
Not from resisting it.
Take an extended break
As well as working on your beliefs about alcohol, another excellent way to drink less (rather than cutting down) is to take a short break from it completely.
This works well because:
A) You’re not trying to cut down or moderate, you’re taking a complete break so there’s no grey area
B) You’re only taking a short break for a few weeks, so it’s not like you’re quitting forever. This can motivate you to stay alcohol free for a few weeks
C) By the time you’ve completed your short break from the booze, you can feel much less attached to it, making it easier to continue your streak
Tempted to take a short break for the booze?
Check these amazing benefits of taking a break from alcohol
Off the booze. Your free 6-step guide
EXPLAIN how moderation or ‘quitting for good’ aren’t your only options
Help you CHANGE HOW YOU THINK about alcohol
EXPOSE your drinking for what it really is
DESTROY your fears about being alcohol-free (you have at least one)
Help you live without booze COMFORTABLY
Conclusion
Cutting down on your drinking (or moderating) are tough because you haven’t addressed your core beliefs about alcohol. This way, not drinking can feel like a punishment because you’re restricting yourself from something you believe you need or is a treat.
Once you have addressed alcohol at its core, and explored if it really is something that helps you, only then will you find it easier to let go.