Goal setting, you say? Who needs that? The only goals I was interested in for most of my life were the ones at each end of a football pitch. GOOOOAAAAAL.
On many an evening and weekends, I would spend hours watching absurdly well-paid footballers achieving their dreams without paying much (if any) attention to where my own life was going. Sound familiar?
Another pint, please.
If you’d have asked me about goal setting, I’d have probably said something like…
“But I’ve got work, the family and bills to worry about. There just isn’t time to think about my own goals, nevermind achieve them. And anyway all that hippy shit isn’t for me, and where would I even start?”
Realisation
I don’t remember the exact day, but a few years ago, when I’d reached the point where I could no longer accept the things in my life that weren’t going well, I finally bit the bullet and started to research ‘Personal Development’.
A theme I’d previously steered clear of and branded as ‘hippy shit’.
I couldn’t have been more wrong.
Yes, there may be some elements to ‘personal development’ that envisions an all-in-one white linen suit and a beach, but that’s not where goal setting or extraordinary lives live.
These days though, I am tempted by a bit of white linen. It’s me age, innit!
Joking aside, goal setting lives much closer to home.
Delve deeper into the world of those footballers that we watch week-in week-out, the musicians, entrepreneurs, artists and athletes we admire and you’ll find story after story of people working hard to achieve their goals.
From nowhere to everywhere. Each story littered with dreams, hard work and goal setting.
As it turns out, life’s winners and those who are living the life of their dreams are the ones who have defined a life vision and are working out ways to get there through goal setting.
Having a life vision
Once I’d got over the fact that personal development wasn’t just about headbands and beads, I became obsessed with the concept of self-improvement and began to devour books and videos on a daily basis, realising along the way that we are each in control of our own destiny if we first know what we want – that’s the first step.
Knowing what we want begins with thinking about your life vision. That is, what you want your best life to look like, before creating and working through the goals you need to get there.
It’s also useful to note that we pretty much all started in the same place, with the exception of a few born into extreme wealth.
Do the most successful people in life have more time than us? More knowledge or money? Maybe they do now, but many of life’s super-achievers came from nothing.
What they do have, however, is the belief, determination and vision to get to where they are today.
A bore draw
Back to the football analogy.
Imagine watching a game of football with no goals, no pitch, no teams, no points to win and no league titles to play for. Pretty boring, right?
How would the players know which way to kick? Who would they pass to and most importantly, why would they bother?
If that sounds stupid, that’s because it is. Sort of.
But the point is. If you don’t know which way you’re kicking (in life) or why, then you’re just going to be hoofing the ball around an empty field.
After a while, that’s going to get boooooring.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.
But shit still happens, right?
Of course, life still goes on. We all go from place to place, job to job, relationship to relationship. We’re all in continuous motion. We can’t stop time.
But if we fail to manage our own game and fail to set our own goals, then it can be all too easy to be swept away by the river of life, ending up miles away from where we hoped we’d be – without a paddle.
Chances are, if you’re unhappy about where you live or work, your finances, a relationship or your physical health then you probably haven’t thought about your life vision or goals in that particular area.
Like the team that plays without a coach, or doesn’t train at all, you’ve set yourself up to lose.
Perhaps it’s time to stop being a spectator and start training for your own game.
A bit like the FA Cup. Dare to dream.
Related: Why I’m getting fit in my forties
Define your future by goal setting
“While we’re living the dreams we have as children fade away.”
The words Liam Gallagher sang on Fade Away are a poignant reminder that we all have dreams, but somewhere between getting older, getting married, work and the kids, our dreams are all too often forgotten.
We need dreams and we need goal setting to help us achieve them, and when we do this, we are doing something MASSIVE.
We’re defining our future in advance. We’re shaping our own destiny, drawing our own map.
Get your boots back on
You can set goals in as many parts of life as you want. Money, relationships, work, your home, health, weight-loss, parenting you name it. In fact the more goals we have to work towards, I believe, the more successful we can become.
Goals = progress. Progress = belief. Belief = bigger goals. (Repeat).
But aren’t we just bound to fail?
As sure as night follows day, working toward any goal will be littered with failure. But if we can learn to embrace failure and see it as our teacher and a way of improving, then our goals will soon be within our grasp.
The truth is, goal setting created classic albums, the modern world that we live in and made our sporting heroes who they are.
Our dreams are just the goals that we are yet to work towards, and just like our heroes, I believe goal setting can make any ordinary life, extraordinary.
Still sounds like hippy shit?
It’s time to get your boots back on.